Day One: A Photo of Yourself

Harlem, New York City

September, 2010

Prep for the Spring RTK Look Book

An appropriate choice for the first picture, I think.  Even though my hair was a little Justin Beiber-ish, I'm really digging how I look here.

I've come quite a way since that first shoot.  My camera is no longer an expensive piece of electronic equipment I leave on automatic.  I'm changing settings because I know what I'm trying to capture and what I need to do to get there.  I enjoy talking to other shutter-bugs about F-stops, apertures and lenses because I'm getting it. I get that you have to have a low F-stop to get that nice, dreamy quality in the background. I get that you have to dial down your shutter-speed to give the illusion of emptiness in a busy place.  I can look at photos now and puzzle out what settings they used, if they used a flash or not.  I'm not saying I know it all, but I know more than I did yesterday and I'm going to know more tomorrow.

Before that shoot, my experience behind the camera had been limited to a point and shoot. Candids from birthday parties, girls' night out, and vacations, that was my portfolio.  This was different.  There was a story to tell through the lip balm and the clothes.  I worked closely with DH to create a storyboard.  As the models got ready that day, DH and I rigged lights, dressed the set, and set up craft services (we keeps it professional).  I had yet to even put the lens on the camera and I started to doubt myself.  My experiences with modeling were from the other side of the camera.  All I knew was head tilts, shoulder leans, and broken doll.   Could I duplicate what we had discussed?  Would I be able to re-tell this boy-meets-girl love story using angles and light?

I look at myself in that photograph now and see apprehension on my face.  Just below it, though, is some confidence, some anticipation.  I look at that photograph and I can see the story behind it.  Before, I would have captioned that photograph "Aspiring Photographer Testing Equipment" (real eloquent, right?).   Now, "Photographer, Self Portrait", is more fitting.